This time of year (summertime, the Fourth of July) can pose challenges to my pescatarian diet.
The prevalence of cookouts and barbecues and the slabs of meat thrown around at such gatherings, is tradition. Showing up with an alternative diet can draw skepticism and curious stares.
Last week, before the July 4th weekend, I asked my “usually” well-spoken coworker what she was doing for the occasion. She said she and her family were getting together in her hometown for a small reunion.
As for the primary food source during the festivities, she said, “We gon’ kill a hug and ‘Bobby Q’ it–I’ll bring you some.”
She wasn’t referring to the demise of an affectionate embrace (a hug), but the slaughter of an adult pig (a hog) in celebration of the occasion.
After I declined her generous offer, I explained to her that I’m a pescetarian, to which she said, “Pass it to Terry, who?”
Her reaction wasn’t the first of its kind I had received—though, one of the more “phonetically translative”—since I’ve been eating this way for quite some time.
My journey to Pescatarianism began when I stopped eating pork in middle school.
One of my best friends’ brother was temporarily immured in a penal facility (read: locked up) and sent my friend a host of documents explaining the deleterious effects of consuming pork and pork by-products (Jell-o, marshmallows, Red 40, Yellow #5, etc. and so on), which my friend shared with some of our peers and me, leading many of us to forsake the “swine,” as we called it.
Of course there is always someone within the group who will take the idea farther than others (I’m raising my hand, in case you can’t see me.), and I started on a path to “meatless-ness.”
I stopped eating pork in middle school, beef in high school, and poultry during the summer before my freshman year in college.
I kept fish as a part of my diet for its benefits of protein, phosphorous, and Omega-3 fatty acids–and because the rapper Rakim said it was his favorite dish in the song ‘Paid In Full.’
I’ve since faced questions, speculations, and ridicule about my diet–even from my family.
One of my uncles (whom I love dearly) says the same thing to me every time he sees me:
“You still don’t eat no damn meat?”
“No, sir,” I always say. “Except for fish.”
“Damn, you’ve been doing that for a while, huh?”
“Yes, sir.”
“I bet those boys who taught you that sh*t are eating meat,” he says. “Probably eat all the meat they can get their hands on: chicken, steak dinners—and your ass is over here eatin’ salad.”
My older cousin (my same uncle’s son) attests that my diet is the reason for me not having bore any children, proclaiming, “You can’t make no baby off no damn Brussels sprouts.” (As you can tell, I’m probably the 7th or 8th most humorous person in my family.)
I’ve grown accustomed to spending my time at cookouts and get-togethers eating potato chips and pasta salad–and that’s only if the pasta salad doesn’t contain crab meat. Because crabs–like shrimp, scallops and other crustaceans–are “bottom feeders” that feed on the waste and excrement of other creatures. They are the “swine of the sea.” (Wow, that took me back to 8th grade.)
But say what you will about the doctrine, it gave me a better self-perspective and healthier eating habits.
I weighed myself a few weeks ago and I was only five pounds heavier than my heaviest weight while in college.
I’ve seen some of my former college classmates and they look like they’ve eaten two pescatarians and had a vegan for dessert. (Okay, that wasn’t nice.)
But I would like to send a shout out to all of the pescatarians, vegetarians, vegans, and other alternative dieters who have friends and family members who invite them to functions and events, but don’t necessarily share their dietary practices.
Be steadfast in your journey, grasshoppers (and grass-eaters), and in the worst case–take your own food.
And at least we’ve gotten one of the “carnivorous” holidays out of the way.
Next up … Labor Day.
Lesson Learned: You can kill a hug … but can’t hug a killer.
